Bumper to Bumper

I have always suspected that bumper stickers –funny, sublime, snarky, sly, wry, offensive, profound- are a uniquely American form of expression.

My class and I are studying the Age of Industry in our American history classes. Earlier on a worksheet, I’d given them the Andrew Carnegie quote “The man who dies rich, dies disgraced” and I was conducting a brief follow-up discussion about the meaning of the quote and whether or not the kids agreed with his thinking.

As part of our discussion, I shared with them a bumper sticker that I’d seen once that distilled Carnegie’s sentiments down to two words: Die Broke. As my students and I were unpacking the meaning of those two words, it occurred to me that bumper stickers might not be a common phenomenon in Hong Kong.

I asked.

They’re not.

So right there in the middle of third period, as an aside to our regular lesson, I had the joy of telling my students about the ideological battles American’s wage on their bumpers six or eight words at a times.

I pointed out to my kids that some bumper stickers are reaction to other bumper stickers. And some are reactions to the reactions.

The example I shared with the class –complete with impromptu drawings on the white board- was the battle of the fishes. First, Christians who were wanting to self-identify, affixed fish to the back of their cars. Evolutionist –and presumed non-Christians- seeing an opportunity to poke a finger in the eye of their ideological opponents- started placing on their bumpers fish with two feet and the word “Darwin” in them.

Unable to resist a good debate when they encounter one, Christians responded by crafting a fish inscribed with the word “Truth” swallowing a Darwin fish.

With the three examples drawn on the board, I explained to my students that to the best of my knowledge, the debate has come to a stop here, thereby implying that the Christians had gotten in the last word.

My students –bear in mind, this is a Christian school- broke out in applause.

It caught me off-guard.

Apparently everybody loves a good melodrama complete with protagonist, antagonist, and vindication even when it does take place on the rear end of a rusted out Chevy Mailibu.

Then it was time to get back to the labor unrest of the 1880s.

-Jack

Point for discussion. Discuss among yourselves: What other nation on earth could ever have giving rise the follow bumper-based exchanged?

“My Child is an Honor Student at Abbott Middle School,”

“My Child Beat up Your Honor Student.”

Classy.

Baseball, apple pie, and snarky bumper stickers.

Nice.

Julie: And while you’re at it, can you explain that whole little-kid-peeing-on-the-Ford-logo thing to me. What’s up with that?

Jack: That? Well, that’s a guy-thing. You wouldn’t understand.