No More Meat for You!

It's the beginning of a new school year, which means that it is time to resume the collective meat order that we teachers submit to a local German butcher. It's a big task, but elementary principal Tim Wong has once again offered to organize it each month.

Seinfeld may have the soup nazi, but we have our very own meat nazi. Following is the email we received at the beginning of the year. Bear in mind, this is the edited down version. Tim is being completely serious here.

Dear ICS Staff members:

We will once again be doing collective meat orders every month.

I don't have the time to chase down people for payment or remind people to pick up their orders. It is your responsibility to pay on time and to pick-up your order on time this year.

Here are the rules this year:

1. Fill out order form...

2. ...and email it to me.

3. Keep note of the order deadline. No extensions given.

4. Payment is in exact cash (no change given). Please place your name and the amount in the envelope and seal it.

5. Money should be deposited by the deadline in the Meat Order Box (located in the Elementary office)

6. I will send ONE email reminder the day before delivery.

7. If you have a reusable bag that you would like us to place your meat in, write your name on it and leave it in the Elementary office before the delivery date.

8. No bags will be provided this year. Your order will be placed on the tables. For larger orders ($500 or more), they will be placed in boxes.

9. Mark the delivery date on your calendar, if you can't pick up your order arrange for someone to do it for you.

Penalties: Since this is a service to you, there will be no exceptions made to late payments or non pick-up of orders this year (we're all friends so don't take it personally):

1. For late payments... you will be removed from the next month's meat order.

2. 2nd late payment... you will be removed from the meat order for the rest of the year.

3. For non-pick of your meat order, it will thaw in the cafeteria and no refund will be given. I will instruct the Hong Yip [maintainence] staff that any meat left in the cafeteria after 6 p.m. will be free for the Hong Yip staff and they will take it away. (I'm not kidding... you have to remember to pick up your order this year... no more reminders).

Attached is the first order of the year:

Order is due Monday, August 23rd.

Delivery will be: Thursday, August 26th

Happy Eating!

Tim “The Butcher's Apprentice” Wong

Picture: one of an endless number of vendors selling -among other things- fish balls. I've had them. Once.