Apparently, it’s not socially acceptable to say to your very pregnant friend, “Amber, you’re not that big -just because your stomach enters the room three minutes before you do”. Well, now you tell me.
Women –it turns out- already know this.
Which got me to thinking that if men were the ones who got pregnant, the social protocol surrounding pregnancy would be radically different.
Gus: Heya fellas. Long time, no see.
Everyone: Hi Gus.
Fred: Dude, you are so huge!
Burt (high-fiving Gus): You are -like, as big as a house!
Fred: How much have you gained?
Gus: (beaming from ear to ear) Forty-seven pounds.
Everyone: Awesome! You are da man!
Fred: (knuckle-tapping Gus) Sweet! Last year, my cousin Karl, put on 51 pounds.
Burt: Somebody get Gus another piece of cheese cake.
So, I’m sorry Amber. I didn’t mean to make you feel bad.
But, it wasn’t my fault.
I couldn’t help it.
I’m a guy.
-Jack
[posted with permission and a lot of laughing]
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